The following are thoughts on accepting ourselves for who we are and then finding the right people to share all that with. Often we try to change ourselves because we try to please the people who are currently in our lives. However, we may need to put in real effort to finding new people who are going to help us be more boldly ourselves.

As a society, we are addicted to gender. For some reason, we believe, deep in our guts, that it is our business to know if someone has a penis or a vagina. We can’t even say these words comfortably in public, but we damn well have a right to the information from every single person on the planet. Right?

For those of you too young to know who I’m talking about, this blog will still be useful. Basically, pick any vagina owner that has shown you that vagina owners are strong, capable, intelligent people that don’t have to be like a man to validate their existence. That was my favorite childhood tv character/show, Mary Taylor Moore, for me.

I remember being very little, maybe about three years old, when I started hearing that some clothes and toys were for girls and others were for boys. I didn’t understand why, and I hated the rules. My brother, who is six and a half years older than I am, had his toy cars, trains, and tractors, and I had stuffed animals and dolls. The trouble was that I liked toys that did stuff. My toys just sat there. My brother’s toys sped around race tracks, dug holes in the sand, had whistles and horns, and more. I loved the tiny cars that had working tires and doors that opened. Those were the toys I wanted, but I was a girl.

What if there were no rules about how we dress, what colors we can like, and what job we can qualify for? What if our sex had nothing to do with with anything but how we enjoyed physical intimacy and if we could bare children? It wouldn’t matter if the person in the dress, heals, and makeup had a vigina or a penis. It wouldn’t matter if we called them he or she, they or them. We would spend none of our time negatively judging a passionate person because they have a vagina or a florist because they have a penis. We would simply go about life without these specific worries and judgments. This is the world I want to live in.